


than are dreamt of in your philosophy

by forochel



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Crack, Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-15
Updated: 2009-07-15
Packaged: 2017-11-02 23:06:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/374373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forochel/pseuds/forochel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(A.K.A. THE ALIEN CONSPIRACY THEORY ABOUT WHY KIBUM WENT MISSING FROM ACTIVITIES FOR LIKE ONE WHOLE YEAR)</p>
            </blockquote>





	than are dreamt of in your philosophy

One day, Kibum isn't there.

They spend one whole day in practice, slotting smoothly into where Kibum should be, and no one notices until Heechul snaps his towel at no-one in particular and cries, "Yah! Kibummie-" to empty space.

Everyone pauses to stare at Heechul, questioning looks on their faces.

Heechul stares back at them, brows drawing together in consternation.

Shiwon steps forwards, reaching out for Heechul in concern, "Hyung? who - who are you talking to?"

"I - I thought - wait," Heechul looks confused, "where's Kibum? was he here for practice?"

There is another pause, before Eeteuk says hesitantly, "Heechul - who's Kibum?"

 

-beat-

 

The next day, Kibum isn't there.

Everyone treads carefully around Heechul, who is moving as though he expects an extra body to be in his personal space all the time, frequently making abortive movements to throw his arms around someone's shoulders.

 

-beat-

 

The day after, Kibum isn't there.

Everyone has separate schedules for the day; radio shows, CF filmings, variety shows, dance lessons, singing lessons. The separation makes it easier for Heechul to pretend that the empty spaces don't exist, being outside of the thirteen of them and with multitudes of other people who only irregularly intersect with his universe makes it easier for him to slot faces in where the gaping spaces appear. He stays out late, that night, sitting in a hole-in-a-wall bar and observing the ebb and flow of people as the night progresses.

He's well into his fifth cup of soju when his trousers buzz.

Heechul gazes dazedly at his vibrating trousers until the bartender says to him, amused, "Aren't you going to check your phone?"

He blinks. "Oh! My phone." He takes it out of his pocket.

 _Donghae_.

 **-where's kibum?** the message says.

He stares at it.

 **ok so now either we're both right or we're both insane** , he types back.

 

-beat-

 

Days, weeks, months later, Kibum isn't there.

They're watching playbacks during the filming of the Sorry Sorry MV, all 12 of them crowded around the monitors, watching how their scenes have been sliced and spliced together, bopping to the beat when an unfamiliar face suddenly flashes on screen.

"Kibum!" Donghae gasps involuntarily; Heechul's grasp on his arm suddenly tightens.

The computer technician pauses the video, freezing the figure on screen.

Everyone stares at the strangely familiar-unfamiliar person, chiaroscuro in the faint glow of the computer screens; his head tilted cockily up and eyes boring straight through the pixels at them.

A susurrus of "Kibum, Kibum, it's _Kibum_ , what?" starts up as they glance around in confusion, gazes eventually all drawn back to the screen.

 

-beat-

 

"Oh, look, another one," someone says cheerfully behind them, "Fresh, is he? How long has he been missing?"

They jump and whip around as one to stare at the tall man in a brown overcoat behind them. He raises an eyebrow at their synchronity.

"Well? Come on then, chop chop, no time to waste, how long has _he_ ," the man nods at Kibum, on the screen, "been gone?"

His Korean is strangely accented, not like Anya's or Eva's, but ... different.

"S-six months?" Donghae says, staring at him.

The man purses his lips, eyebrows shooting up to his hairline.

"That long! Huh, must come of being a celebrity, then. Interesting, interesting..." He taps his lower lip, apparently lost in thought as he stares at Kibum-on-the-screen.

Kangin idly wonders why no one stopped him from coming in, or why no one is calling security. Oh. Wait.

"Oi, you -" Kangin says, "Who are you?"

"I," says the strange foreigner with the mad eyes, "am the Doctor."

They stare at him, discombobulated.

 

-beat-

 

"AN ALIEN INVASION?" Donghae sounds unaccountably excited, considering that this supposed alien invasion is why his favourite dongsaeng has been missing for the better part of the year.

"...Aliens," Heechul drawls sceptically.

The rest of Super Junior just stares at the Doctor.

"Oh yes, yes, sucking your friend there into a digital dimension, life-forces and-"

"THEY'RE FEEDING OFF KIBUM?!" Donghae screeches, eyes widening.

The Doctor winces. "Well, no, not exactly, they exist off the belief in him - which I suppose is why he's lasted this long. He won't much last longer, though; the strain is too much for his body. Even though it's pixellated. _Which_ is why one of you is going to have to go with me."

There is a collective pause, and then Hyukjae ventures "Kibum knows English, you can go yourself?"

"BUT KIBUM DOESN'T KNOW THE DOCTOR," Donghae interjects excitedly.

"Precisely! So _you_ are coming with me!" The Doctor slings an arm around Donghae's shoulders.

"M-ME?" Donghae cries excitedly.

"YES, YOU!"

"WAIT." Heechul shouts, "HOW DO WE KNOW THAT YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THOSE ALIEN PEOPLE OR THAT YOU'RE NOT JUST STARK RAVING MAD."

"I get that all the time," the Doctor says airly, "but. Trust me, I'm a Doctor."

He grins, and runs off, Donghae in tow, the rest of Super Junior and the crew pounding after them.

 

-beat-

 

"The TARDIS," the Doctor grins at Donghae as he bows Donghae into a blue police-box, "Allon-sy!"

Donghae looks around with wide eyes at the inside of the TARDIS as the Doctor calibrates things at the console.

"So! Off we go to a pixellated dimension and you - what's your name?"

"I'm Donghae."

"Brilliant! Alright then, and your friend - Kibum, you said? Right then, I'm going to need you to talk to him, sort of just give him a little push in the right direction."

Donghae gives the Doctor a consternated look.

"Why? Can't we just ... zap in, retrieve Kibum, and zap back out?"

"Well that's the problem, Kibum's been trapped there for ages, so he's sort of - got pixellated, you see? More and more theirs and less _your_ dimension -"

"-what do you mean, _my_ dimension?"

The Doctor blows at his forelock exasperatedly. "Never mind that! The point is you've got to remind him of who he is, that sort of thing - you can do it, you're friends, aren't you?"

Donghae blinks, and then he smiles. "Yeah, best friends."

 

-beat-

 

They're moving through a strange place, sort of like swimming in honey and - "we've got to make it quick," the Doctor whispers, "or else we'll get pixellated too" - but Donghae wonders how anyone can be quick here, until the Doctor does some sort of weird slithery movement and sort of _phases_ into another space. The Doctor's face is weird and distorted through the - wall? There is a wall between them, Donghae sees that now, and the Doctor is on the other side and he doesn't know what to do and the panic is rising in his chest while the Doctor widens his eyes at Donghae and makes frantic "come here!" movements. He's just about ready to choke on the hard ball of fear in his throat when the Doctor makes the slithery movement again and Donghae recognises it now, sort of - it looks like one of Hyukjae's favourite dance moves, so Donghae does it and - he's through the wall.

"Well, thank you for finally getting that," the Doctor says, "Let's go."

They slither through walls that Donghae can sometimes see, sideways and down and up, until there is a splash of colour in the otherwise colourless landscape.

"Kibum?" the name slips out breathlessly, a puff of not-quite air in this jellyish world. The Doctor looks at him sharply, says nothing, surges on through cell after cell.

They're getting closer, so close, and then they're brushing past the wall to the splash of colour and Donghae stops, tries to turn back. The Doctor clicks his teeth impatiently and hauls him around by the collar.

"Not your friend, no need to look!" he grits out, but it's too late; Donghae's already caught a glimpse of the body behind them; a petite girl in an orange dress and yellow hat, laughter frozen into her face, white skin criss-crossed with crystal lines. He shudders and pushes quicker on ahead.

 

-beat-

 

Kibum's moving so slowly, excruciatingly so; the time it takes for him to turn his head to Donghae is the time it takes for the Doctor to tap his foot six times, wrinkle his nose twice, and look over his shoulder about fifteen times. It is all Donghae can do not to throw his arms around Kibum and hold him tight; only the Doctor's warning of "he might break into a million little pieces!" keeps his arms at his side.

His voice is soft, barely there as he whispers, "Hyung, Hyung"

Kibum's eyes are wide and hollow, and Donghae can barely stand the lack of life in them, none of the quiet laugher or smouldering (fake) anger that he is used to see; he wants and wants and says, "Yes, Kibummie, yes, I'm here, I'm here, I'm here," chants it like a prayer, watching hopefully as Kibum's skin gains colour.

The Doctor sniffs impatiently and snaps, "Oh, no need to be so bashful about it; I'll turn my back if you want." And promptly does so, leaving Donghae to gape at him, and then at Kibum.

"D-Donghae," Kibum croaks, his hands twitching towards Donghae.

"Well, go on, then!" The Doctor says, having evidently turned back to widen his eyes very urgently at Donghae.

"What?" Donghae says, mystified.

"What do you mean, _what_. Just _snog_ him already!"

"WHAT?"

" _Hurry_." the Doctor hisses, his head whipping around to the direction they came from.

Left with no alternative, Donghae leans forward to press his lips to Kibum's, which are cool and dry;he swipes his tongue into Kibum's mouth, more breathing warmth into Kibum than kissing him. Kibum chokes a bit - and it would be funny that Kibum is _choking on his tongue_ except not - before kissing him back, hands slipping onto Donghae's waist and it is all wonderful and peachy keen and completely girly when the Doctor interrupts.

"All right, that's enough. I'll take him and you follow," and then the Doctor sort of rips Kibum out of Donghae's hands and flings him over his shoulder and starts slithering back towards the TARDIS.

Kibum flops very hilariously over the Doctor's back, and looks like he is slowly working up to a rage.

 

-beat-

 

They rush into the TARDIS and Donghae barely has time to slam the door shut on the really fucking strange aliens that were chasing them for a good half of their return journey before the Doctor does fiddly things at the console and they're zipping back into their dimension.

The entirety of Super Junior is waiting impatiently right where the TARDIS last appeared, and when Kibum stumbles out of the blue door, Donghae's arms around his waist and the Doctor's maniacal grin rising magnificently above their heads, they roar in excitement and jump on them (the Doctor excepted). Donghae wrestles them off, until everyone is gathered in a very tight circle with Heechul clinging to Kibum, petting his hair and pinching his cheeks and saying ridiculous things like "look how thin you've got! and your hair! it is awful, go cut it, you look disgusting". Kibum bears it all with a familiar air of long-suffering, and everyone breathes a sigh of relief that Kibum is all right.

Manager-hyung, who has always for some strange reason been the main believer in Donghae's alien stories, tells Kibum to go home and rest up; PR has come up with several plausible stories, and he is supposed to be recovering from a near-fatal attack of asthma.

Yes, _asthma_.

 

-beat-

 

"I TOLD YOU ALIENS EXIST."

 

**End**

 

Epilogue:

"DONGHAE, GET OUT OF KIBUM'S BED." Eeteuk screamed. "KIBUM IS RECOVERING FROM HAVING HIS LIFE ENERGIES SUCKED OUT BY ALIENS, HE IS TO HAVE NO PHYSICALLY RIGOROUS ACTIVITY!"

"THAT'S NOT WHAT HE WAS SAYING!" Donghae shouted back.

"I DOUBT HE HAD THE BREATH TO SAY ANYTHING."

"THAT'S JUST HOW GOOD I AM."

At which point Heechul screeched, "SHUT UP DICKHEADS SOME PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO SLEEP HERE."

 


End file.
